I was kind of a very active type of gal when I was young! Yes when I was young.:) A new thing for me is a very entertaining and cool so discovering new stuffs around me are kind of magic. I grew up with kids surrounding me from my neighbors, friends and to my two siblings. I still recalled that I love playing so much especially out door with my friends. I love weekends for the fact that I can play with no limits according to my beliefs even though my Mother has this strong law about “No playing out door”, and should only be inside the house studying our school assignments. I never followed my Mom instruction, instead I escaped and head out playing with my neighbors and of course to have fun which should be being a kid. I didn’t care what my Mother does to me once she found out that I just escaped.
I remember one time, my Mom told me to keep an eye on the rice she cooked because she is going to the market for our dinner. The market is about 5minutes walk from our house! I said to my Mom okay don’t worry ill watched over it. But the minute I saw my Mom blurry from my two little cute eyes, is also the minute I jumped outside playing with my neighbors. All of the sudden I heard my Mom screaming at me because the Rice turned all block burning and it is 1million % burned. Hey maybe your saying it’s my Mom fault why she left and letting me to take over the Rice instead of she’s the one. As it is her obligation and responsibilities. But hey it is in the Philippines so don’t bother to think lol
One day I was playing with my playmates and accidentally my upper leg hurt. I noticed it was sore and its bleeding good amount of blood. It left me with this big scar the reason why I hate wearing a swim suite as I’m ashamed to show off.
I remember during the weekdays I have to save my allowance from school so at the weekend I have enough money to rent a bicycle for less than 4 hours. Because I’m a new beginner I have trouble finding myself teaching riding the bicycle. My mother is working and my father is distance from us so no body’s teaching me on how to ride the bicycle but myself alone. At the end I found that I am a good rider after falling of hundred times and receiving scars from that bicycle.
The most memorable one was the scar through my left leg. I remember my mother says, “Don’t touch the powder milk I set aside because that’s only enough for our budget for this week.” But I didn’t know I was addicted to the powder milk by then. I was rushed to the hospital because of the Thermos that loaded of boiled hot water poured onto my left leg. It happened because I’m having trouble reaching the milk next to the thermos. I know it is me to blame and it is my fault. The incident marked me with this anxiety and consciousness knowing that I really hate wearing Skirt or short during the day time. And yes only on the day time because night doesn’t bother me! 🙂
The most unforgettable scar that I hate the most was the chicken pox and I blamed myself for not taking care of my skin. I remember my mother keeping an eye on me during the chicken pox of mine. But because I am very hard headed I scratched it to death as I remember it was freaking itching. The chicken pox marked 2 little scars souvenir that noticeable in my cheeks grrrrr.
The above story about the scars in my body contributes regretful, annoying, and consciousness on me. I feel ugly and feel pity inside of me! Nobody’s has to blame but myself alone. Why I never gave the chance to listen to my poor mother and stay out of those one knowing that it can hurt me. But it’s too late now; if I can take it back I already turn and change it all. But all I can do now is too learn those mistakes of scars I own.
I have one lesson to open up to you my readers. How about those stuffs that scars should be the only way to add up your last breath? How about those body that the only option is to get this biggest scar just to survive from dying pain? And having big scars doesn’t matter as it’s the only option they got.
One of my Sister In-law is a survivor from a breast cancer. When i talked to her I asked about how it feels to be a breast cancer patient. She replied to me that it was awful to see her one breast that has a problem and her body and soul fighting to survived. I asked her the possible cause why these breasts Cancer exist in some human body? She replied me with no exact answer because even she herself has no idea. She just told me that she’s a healthy conscious lady, she exercise good and her life style is very good according to the needs of a human body.
During the conversation with my sister In-law, I found a reason to be glad and not to hate my scars itself. Looking back that I’m very lucky enough. I wonder how their feelings knowing that they hardly wear their swim suite now. Knowing that the scar they have is the reason of their heartaches and the dying pain. But deep inside of me I felt sympathy because I know how it feels to be broken knowing that one part of our body is missing.
I thought of writing this type of article since early this month. My husband and I went to the Hard Rock store to purchase the jacket that I really wanted to have for this fall season. When I’m ready to pay the pink bracelet catches my attention, until the cashier told me that it is a symbol for October Is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I opted to get the bracelet, one for me and one for my sister In-law.
Last Saturday my husband and I went to Clinique beauty store and then the Cashier hand me this cute tiny pink ribbon. Again the cashier told me it’s October Is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. While at Tram it crosses to my mind to write about the history of my scars.
For you to know about breast cancer in a way you never saw before please click the link http://www.thescarproject.org/gallery/ the scar survivor heroes in my eyes.